In my last yearly retrospect, I couldn’t have predicted that 2021 would be even more difficult than 2020 (and I know this might be just speaking for myself). Regardless, there’s always a bright side to every challenge, and more often than not, it involves growth and learning. This year was no exception. Through all the problems I’ve personally had to surmount and especially those that I couldn’t, I picked up a few things that I hope will make me a better person in the year to come.
So here are a few thing I’ve learned in 2021 and what I resolve to do better in 2022.
Change is the only constant
In 2019, I talked about how transformational the year was for me and at that time, I had expected to just stay the course for a bit in 2020. Then 2020 came along and the world pretty much took a 180-degree turn and it was common sense to adapt my own personal situation to what the times called for. Surely, 2021 would be a year of stability, right?
As it turns out, a whole lot more changed for me this year, for better or for worse.
My father passed away from COVID-19 in the early part of the year. A few months later, my wife and I decided to move to a new place as our daughter, Harper, was growing up really fast and needed a bigger but safe community so she could fully explore and enjoy even amidst all the restrictions and fear brought about by the pandemic.
Likewise in the workplace, a huge wave of people leaving our team also happened in the first half of the year compelled us to adapt and brought about many inevitable changes to both how we structured our teams and the goals we had for the year.
With all that’s happened, I’ve now wholeheartedly and gratefully accepted the fact that regardless of how you want your course to turn out, change is unstoppable. It’s not a bad thing – at least half of the time, change is positive. And even the negative ones can be an opportunity to build character and shape a better reality for yourself and the people around you.
So this 2022, I’m resolving to embrace change and to make the most of it, regardless of how uncomfortable it might be.
A sports team, not a family
Speaking of people leaving, this year reinforced in me and in my workplace the value of acting like a sports team and not a family. It’s not easy to leave a family (at least not without a lot of collateral damage), but you can easily leave a sports team when things aren’t clicking.
There’s a good side to it. Being in a sports team also means a lot of self-accountability and holding each other accountable. People have your backs, but only to the extent you have theirs. Additionally, it means that each person has a specific role and he or she plays the heck out of it all towards the goal of winning as a team.
I think that’s a really meaningful metaphor especially in the context of movement and change. When people leave, there are no hard feelings, only an adjustment. And for those that stay, continuing to keep each other in check and filling in whatever roles need to be filled makes it all that much easier to transition.
In 2022, I resolve to keep making this a little mantra and fully appreciate and live out what it means to me and the people I work with.
Resilience is good… if we learn from it
At the tail end of 2021, a huge storm, Typhoon Odette (international name: Rai) came through the central Philippines where I’m from and caused incredible damage to my homebase as well as many other areas nearby. In the midst of all the horrible scenes around the city, there was a bright light in seeing how people picked up the pieces almost immediately and how, as a collective society, we managed to bounce back to a semblance of normal in a encouragingly short time.
This kind of resilience, I believe, is very important because it allows us to move forward in the face of challenges we have little control over. But being continuously resilient without any improvement in the situation is simply unsustainable. The only good way to come out of a disaster is to come out of it stronger, and we can do that only by understanding what went wrong and assessing what we can do to make it better.
The same principle helped us a lot at Synacy as the wave of resignations happened this year. I’m proud to say and believe that we have come out of it as a stronger organization thanks to people making themselves heard and everyone who had the power to make changes taking the time to listen. I hope we can also do our part in learning from the aftermath of the super typhoon. And for 2022, I resolve to hold myself even more accountable to learn from whatever adversity might come.
A little kindness
In the end, we all just need a little kindness and compassion.
When I lost my father, I was overwhelmed by the amount of support and understanding I got from family, friends, and colleagues. Myself aside, other people I worked with also faced similar tragic circumstances – two of whom lost their fathers as well.
This is not discounting all the other personal difficulties at different scales I’m sure everyone, at some point, went through throughout the year. As I already mentioned, we parted ways with workmates and friends who left our team. Another one of my teammates took an immediate leave just before the holiday break to recover after realizing just how much he was burnt out from the year. Perhaps most tragically, we lost a couple of colleagues in the company who passed away – one from COVID-19, the other from a heart problem.
Throughout all this, there’s not much one can do except to show a little kindness. Kindness, in addition to resilience, made it possible for the city to bounce back the way it did after Typhoon Odette. Giving way became a norm around town and it was easy to see that, even as desperation was creeping in.
And if there’s one resolution I hope I can follow through on among all of this, it’s to be a little bit kinder this year. That means saying more nice things about others, celebrating each other a little bit more, and using whatever excess I have to make lives easier for others. After all we’ve been through, a kind word and a helping hand is something we all deserve.
I had originally written this to be a yearender, holiday message, but the storm caused me to defer this, among many other important plans, a bit later. Nonetheless, I do think there’s no better time than now, at the very beginning of a year, to reflect on things past as well as set new intentions. So here’s to the difficult year that was 2021, and may we all have more happiness this 2022!
P.S. I know this year hasn’t been the most active for me, but I’ll definitely try to write a bit more in the next year. Additionally, I’ve gotten some gear that might just help me come up with video content, so a YouTube channel is definitely in the works. Hope to catch you around for it!
Dexter is an engineering manager at Synacy, a co-founder of ATeam Business Software Solutions, and founder of TechManagement.Life. He loves to share his experiences and thoughts on managing software teams and running businesses.